UnRecipe: ERMAHGURRRRD - French Fries!!

Happy Meatless Monday, which I would consider it the Post-Thanksgiving/Meat Hangover, given our glutton-filled weekend of turkey-turkey-everything. So to cleanse our roadblocked intestines and overworked filter organs, how about something simple with delightful sweet potatoes? Oh, who am I kidding -- it's the holidays, and the checkered flag was waved as of Thanksgiving, so it's time to Unleash the Kraken for rich, delicious food that we'll have all of 2013 to regret stuffing our faces with.

Sweet Potato Buffalo Fries... because, yeah, that's a thing - Photo by Wasabi Prime

I'll be the first to admit that I make unreasonable bargains with myself when it comes to food. I'll say "no" to Yukon gold potatoes because they're so starchy, and "yes" to sweet potatoes and yams because they have more nutrients and a little lower starch content... and then douse those slightly more nutritious sweet potatoes and yams with sauces, cheese and whatever else that negates that little extra bit of health they offered. I've never made myself out to be a Health Saint, that's for sure, but when I crave French fries -- which is fairly often -- I'll do what I can to try and squeeze out whatever little bit of nutritional value I can. Enter: Buffalo Wing Yam Fries.

Thanksgiving sort of ruined yams, in my opinion. How they got to become synonymous with being in a casserole dish, covered with marshmallows is beyond me. I blame the South, the Midwest, and the Flyover States in general for ruining a perfectly delicious spud, giving it the false beard of "appetizer" when it's really some unholy dessert in that terrible guise. So I thought I'd ruin yams in my own, special Wasabi-way, dousing it in Frank's Hot Sauce and sprinkled with crumbles of blue cheese. Totally unrelated to Thanksgiving, I just really wanted Buffalo Wings. Which, really, who doesn't? I also thought this would be a great Meatless Monday/Junk Food Binge meal. Who says vegetarianism doesn't have a naughty side? Nothing with a face went into this heaping pile of indulgence, so let this spicy, cheesy flavor-fest rock your vegetarian socks off.

Cheesy spicy potato goodness - Photos by Wasabi Prime

If you decide to make this beast of a meatless feast, take some yams -- peeled or unpeeled, the skins are fine if you leave them on -- and cut into fry-shaped wedges. Yams really are the best for this because of their intense bright orange color -- it really plays into the Buffalo Wings theme, and as they say, we eat with our eyes first. Toss with vegetable oil and some salt and pepper, and spread out on a baking tray lined with parchment paper, to keep them from sticking. Put the tray in a preheated 420-degree oven. High heat is good, it will roast the potatoes, pull out all that moisture, and help dry them out a bit. You can fry them, this would make them true fries, but deep frying is a pain in the rear, and this works in a pinch. I usually run the tray under the broiler for a minute or two, just to give it a little crisp, but they'll burn fast, so keep an eye on them. While they're still hot, toss the yams with your favorite hot sauce (Frank's is my favorite), and then sprinkle crumbles of blue cheese over it before eating with abandon. Baked fries aren't as crisp as deep-fried ones, but once they've got sauce and cheese on them, you'll eat them with a fork, so that's why I feel the baked vs deep-fried option is negligible.

My second Fry Binge was with sweet potatoes. I told you, I crave French fries A LOT, so I like having some options to make those unreasonable food bargains with myself to pretend the food isn't as rich and naughty as it truly is. This fry-binge was inspired by that fabulous creation from Canada, poutine. If you've never had poutine, it's Mana from Heaven -- crispy fries doused with gravy and topped with squeaky cheese curds. I don't know the backstory over how poutine was invented. I'm guessing it was probably the result of a very drunk beer-soaked night, but much like our own US-equivalent of pile o' drunk food -- nachos -- it's a cure for what ails when there's too many ales. This version is meatless -- no gravy -- just a basic bechamel sauce. I added spice by seasoning the sweet potatoes with a mix of extra pepper and cayenne before they were baked. While the spiced sweet potato fries are roasting in the oven -- same temperature as the yam fries -- I use the stovetop to make the bechamel, which just a basic white sauce that I add a mixture of cheeses to towards the end. I added white cheddar and parmesan, but you can add whatever cheeses you like.

How sweet it is - sweet potato fries with cheese sauce - Photo by Wasabi Prime

This of course results in yet another messy pile o' gooey food, but who cares, as it was delicious. Cheesy, spicy sweet potato goodness. The nice thing about sweet potatoes and yams is that they have a noticeable and distinctive flavor -- they're not neutral like a typical plain potato. The natural sweetness takes the addition of spice really nicely, the richness of a sauce and strong cheese doesn't drown out the potato. For the cheesy sweet potato fries, adding a healthy sprinkle of paprika before serving helps keep it from being pale, white food, and it reminds your eyes that you're eating something with a little kick.

So let the celebration of the holidays begin -- we can happily swaddle ourselves in heavy winter coats and Snuggies as we dig into all our favorite foods. At least until January first comes around and we can make all those pesky resolutions to eat carrot sticks for every meal.

30 Rocks My Socks: Dealbreaker!

For those who haven't heard, NBC's 30 Rock is a freakin' funny show. And that says a lot because I rarely enjoy situational comedy, aka, "The Sitcom." Short of early seasons of The Simpsons, most sitcoms are kind of... awful. The magic of Tina Fey's brain and all her wacky castmates creating behind the scenes shenanigans of an SNL-like series melted my Grinchy heart. Plus it's awash with arcane quotable lines, which I will mercilessly pepper this post with, so deal wit it, Cate Blanchett!

When one of my favorite blogs, The Chickenless Kitchen, announced a cooking challenge to come up with a 30 Rock-themed recipe, I immediately thought, That's crazy! But then I heard Tracy Morgan/Tracy Jordan's high-functioning alcoholic voice exclaim: Who's crazier? Me or Anne Curry?! Short of hearing the voice of God or seeing a burning bush, I felt like my questionable mental stability must be issuing an edict to make this challenge happen! So with the help of Mr. Wasabi, who is a huge 30 Rock fan, we came up with something as disturbing and indulgent as the show is. We like to call this little beastmaster, The Dealbreaker.

There's a sandwich under there, I swear! - Photo by Wasabi Prime

Much like the confused look of terror that's probably on your face right now, there's just no easy way of explaining this. It's a bit like walking in on a crime being committed. The foodie foundation of The Dealbreaker is a Croque Monsieur, which is French for the sandwich that will surely end you -- the meaning loses a bit in translation, trust me. A grilled ham and cheese sandwich wasn't enough, no sir, this one had to be smothered in a beer cheddar sauce. Main character Liz Lemon's favorite thing is a sandwich, because it's a perfect meal placed between two slices of bread, and one of her absolute favorite foods is cheese -- any and all of it. Much like this meal, Liz is a big hot mess, as shown by this ample collection of quotes and gags.



The name, Dealbreaker, refers to a catch phrase from a self-help character Liz creates for her skit comedy show that's full of quotable relationship advice like, "Long distance is the wrong distance - shut it down!" The radioactive colored crumbles over the top are a nod to Sabor de Soledad, The Taste of Solitude, or generic offbrand Cheetos, as Liz calls them. Alec Baldwin's awesomely offensive network exec, Jack Donaghy, discovers there is an actor who looks like him, playing a villain called the Generalissimo on a Telemundo soap opera. Donaghy's trying to win over his girlfriend's mother who hates the Generalissimo, so he plots to have the character killed off on the series, so his face isn't associated with someone she hates. Here is a clip that mentions Sabor de Soledad, and also happens to be awesome:



I'd like to believe this is a Liz Lemon-worthy meal, as it's designed for an indulgent serving of one, enjoyed in the comfort of one's home at some late night hour on a Saturday night, watching the Generalissimo on TV, curled up under a Slanket.

The Dealbreaker

Sandwich
2 slices of bread
4 thin slices of ham
slices of gruyere cheese - enough to cover one side of the bread
1 tbsp butter (for grilling sandwich and spreading on bread)

Sauce
6 oz beer, preferably an ale (just drink the rest, I did)
3/4 cup shredded cheddar cheese
1 tbsp butter
1 tbsp flour
salt and pepper to taste

For garnish: 1/4 cup crushed Sabor de Soledad (or Cheetos, whatever)

Make sauce first: on a burner set to medium, place a small saucepot and melt the butter and sprinkle in flour. Incorporate the ingredients untilthe paste is slightly browned and slowly add the beer, mixing or whisking constantly to remove lumps. Reduce burner temperature to low. When sauce is smooth, slowly add in handfuls of the shredded cheddar until it's melted and a creamy sauce has formed. Add salt and pepper to taste and set aside.

For the sandwich: smear the butter on both sides of the inside surface of the bread and lay down a layer of gruyere and ham. Place a skillet on the stove and turn on burner to medium. Melt a pat of butter in skillet and grill the sandwich on both sides, pressing to ensure inside is melted and fused together.

Plate the grilled sandwich and pour sauce over the top. Sprinkle over bits of Sabor de Soledad and shout to the world, THAT'S A DEALBREAKER, LADIES!

Special Wasabi thanks to local bakery, Macrina, who provided a loaf of their amazing Pane Francese, a bread developed from grape yeast from Hightower Cellars. It's a really hearty and flavorful bread which stood up to all this 30 Rock silliness. I'm fairly sure Liz Lemon would wrestle the Pane Francese from my hands in the street to make a sandwich out of it... but not without a fight, Ms. Lemon!

Let's make a Deal(breaker) with the help of Macrina Bakery - Photos by Wasabi Prime

UnRecipe: A-Team Montage Meal

In 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire... The A-Team. (courtesy Wikipedia)

*Cue awesome opening theme music, totally rad all-black van with red stripe along the side, and lots of 1980s controlled pyrotechnic explosions*

I had a refrigerator full of random leftover ingredients from various meals. Something needed to happen, lest mass spoilage take over. And I had not the awesome manpower of Hannibal, Face, B.A. Barracus, nor their uncanny ability to break out "Howling Mad" Murdoch from the psych ward for yet another weekly hour-long episode. I took matters into my own hands. By the Power of MacGyver cooking, inspired by several seasons' worth of A-Team montages where the team inexplicably built a fully loaded armored vehicle out of some bailing wire and an old beater Volvo, I set to work, creating new meals of scraps and spare parts.

I pity the fool who doesn't like this blue cheese and tomato tart - Photo by Wasabi Prime

There was a bit of pie dough remaining from the goat cheese and roasted plum tart. I also still had a handful of fresh Sweet 100 cherry tomatoes from blog buddy, Picket Fence, as well as chunks of leftover blue cheese. It wasn't an armored tank miraculously pieced together to raise hell on some vigilante baddies, but a rustic blue cheese and tomato tart was certainly disarming on an edible level. I flattened the spare bit of dough into a rough circle, put a thin layer of fig jam (yes, I realize I'm addicted) on the bottom, crumbled the cheese over that, and dotted the whole tomatoes over the surface. I folded the edges in, so it created a low wall, and drizzled a bit of olive oil and lemon thyme over the top before popping it into the oven to bake itself to roasted cheesy goodness. Delicious results that would convince even the ill-tempered B.A. to agree to get on a plane.

The broiler hides all manner of odd-shaped vegetable scrap sins - Photo by Wasabi Prime

Waste not, want not, even if that includes melon-baller shaped scraps of vegetable innards that were saved from hollowing out several yellow table squash for the Meatless in Seattle post. I know, it's weird that I kept them, but there was enough to take up a big plastic yogurt container and it felt like a terrible waste to simply toss them. I was hell-bent with the conviction of Col. John "Hannibal" Smith, to use up those odd-shaped scraps. Sauteeing the squash with more refugees from the vegetarian meal like homemade pesto, and tossing with cooked penne pasta, I put the creamy mix into a baking dish, covered with leftover fresh mozzarella and parmesan cheese, and placed it under the blazing coils of the broiler to get browned and crispy. Sure, it wasn't fancy, but this impromptu baked pasta had delicious flavor of summer pesto with the rich creamy texture of melted cheese, and no remainders of the Meatless in Seattle meal went to waste.

Chorizo is just another way of convincing us that pork truly is a magical animal - Photos by Wasabi Prime

A-Team, meet the Protein Team. A cryogenically-preserved bit of chorizo from the Way-Back Machine of stuffed pattypan squash yielded two egg-themed dishes. The leftover savory custard from the goat cheese and plum tart filled a spare ramekin, which was partially filled with the chorizo, and a mighty meaty quiche was created. The remainder of the chorizo was mixed with some defrosted mashed sweet potato. I had a little container of roasted, mashed sweet potato also in the freezer, no lie. I made pan-fried croquettes from this mixture, browning the outsides and then serving them up with a fried egg over the top. Not quite sure what kind of dish that would be, other than simply saying it was tasty and filled with comfort food delight.

At the end of several weeks' worth of meal leftovers and wayward ingredients, everything found a way to be incorporated into a new meal. As Hannibal would say during each A-Team episode, I love it when a plan comes together. Amen, to that. *Freeze frame, then let credits roll *

UnRecipe: Labor-Free Labor Day Dinner

The Labor Day weekend marks off the waning days of summer. It's also the weekend I'll be at Penny Arcade Expo, in support of Brock and his workplace, so taking the "Labor" out of Labor Day, I'm posting something that happened a couple of weeks ago when the weather was nicer than what it is now.

I'm starting to see hints of gold and red appear on trees, the backyard garden is showing off what will be its final blooms, and it's getting to where we'll have to cut down the last of the our basil before the weather gets too cold for its tender leaves. We'll make at least one batch of pesto, but there's something really nice about enjoying fresh-picked herbs in food. Enjoying all that is best about summer, we had a dinner outside with all our favorite things, including Insalata Caprese with an antipasto platter of cheese, meat and our regular meal companion, fig jam!

Summer in the raw with a Caprese salad - Photo by Wasabi Prime

We didn't grow tomatoes this year, so it was a treat to pick up some heirlooms for dinner. I love their lumpy-bumpy, wabi-sabi shape. A lot of the ones being sold now are showing signs of being late in the harvest -- a lot of splitting --but we were fortunate to find two whose surfaces were intact and firm. A handful of freshly cut basil leaves were shredded up and sprinkled between the slices of tomato and mozzarella cheese. Drizzled with a little balsamic vinegar and olive oil, and the main course was ready to eat.

Bright colors are tasty - Photo by Wasabi Prime

I know I've featured fig jam and cheese quite a bit over summer. It's my new love affair, both at home and in the office. I just can't quit you, Fig Jam. Paired with a couple of different cheeses (spicy jalapeno havarti and a pungent, creamy blue), its deeply-flavored, sticky sweetness made them almost like a dessert that still tasted good with large chunks of fatty dry-aged meat, which is a pretty nice thing. We poured ourselves a glass of wine and threw some wood into our little outdoor fire pit to further set the mood. Sure, we could have gone out to dinner, but sitting in the backyard, enjoying a quiet summer evening felt like a pretty good argument for spending the night at home.

Private dining at Chez Wasabi - Photos by Wasabi Prime

Indulging in what will most likely be the last few weeks of our precious summer, I wanted to linger on this post a little while longer, to share more photos featuring the colors of the season. When the winter chill returns and the yard becomes less hospitable for lazy weekend dinners, these pictures will make me happy, looking forward for sweet harvests and blossoms to come.

Le jardin du Wasabi and meals good to the last bite - Photos by Wasabi Prime

*Post Script - Grazie mille to FoodGawker and Serious Eats' Photograzing for picking the luscious sliced heirloom toh-mah-toh photo from this post.

Merci Buttercups: Dynamic Office Duo

I don't say it as often as I should, but I'm very fortunate to work with the people at my office. Without going into gory details, it can be busy, hectic times, where projects frequently go into the weeds, and the two main gals who are the Bette Midler Wind Beneath My Wings are, as I'd like to now refer to as, The Dynamic Office Duo (Renee and Michelle). They are the purveyors of pastries, the sirens of Starbucks runs, and general bringers of joy to Cubicle Village of the Damned. Plus we've got a wicked magazine exchange going on, which is quite nifty.

Way better than a ham and cheese sandwich - Photo by Wasabi Prime

Every once in a while, there are special lunches. We all share a deep abiding love for cheese, so one day, we shared in a lovely midday meal of fresh apricots, candied pecans, whisper-thin wafers, and a big slab of soft blue cheese with a dollop of fig jam. No heating required, just a few simple ingredients and you have a meal that makes a normal day at the office a little more special. And that really is a good thing, and something I thought was worth sharing because I really do have much Wasabi Prime-love for the Dynamic Office Duo and all the extra things they do to make the day go by. Cheers to you, ladies!

* Post Script - Thanks to both Food Gawker, Serious Eats' Photograzing, and FoodieView for posting the pic of the cheesy goodness of our office lunch!

UnRecipe: Antipasto is Anti-work-o

God bless the Italians, getting the notion to serve a small plate of edibles to signal that a meal of even more food is yet to come. I skipped the additional courses, but took the creation of an antipasto platter to heart and put together a satisfying and simple lunch whilst entertaining a visiting friend over the weekend.

No need to be fancy, just dig in! - Photo by Wasabi Prime

I'm quite keen on these no-cook solutions for a meal because it can be simple, made with a collection of items sitting in the refrigerator, and it doesn't require calling the pizza guy in a chronic fit of "I Don't Know What To Cook!"

There's a lot to be said over the value of an ample supply of pickled vegetables. Their briny state ensures a long fridge-life, and they all tend to play well with one another when eaten together. I had a random collection of spiced green beans, cornichons, cocktail onions, as well as a jar of kalamata olives. I'm sure because the label says "cocktail onions" one is supposed to use them in a cocktail, but I have such a merciless love of strong vinegar flavors, I eat them with abandon, a frosty Gibson or some other old-timey cocktail being optional. I also usually have a jar of pepperocinis, but because they are my absolute favorite of the briny bunch, they are of course the first to be consumed into absence. Combined with a few rough slices of sopressata to round out the protein brigade, the savory component of the meal was complete.

While going to the grocery store, Brock (aka, Mr. Prime) and I happened upon a block of creamy havarti (I love you with all my havarti), and a wedge of raw milk blue cheese. The cheese shopping spree also resulted in a jar of fig preserve, a rich, lovely paste that was a delightful combination of sweet and savory. Poured over the cheese, the preserve added a caramelized sweetness and a bit of crunch from the fig seeds in the jam. To add another sweet component to the Salty vs Sweet throwdown, a nectarine was sliced, and it actually went well with nearly everything served.

I didn't want to rely only on the nibbles and made a salad as backup, using lettuce and peas from the garden, so yes, Mom, we had our greens. The only thing that would have made this meal better was if we were eating it outdoors, in a charming picnic sort of way, but the kitchen counter with a glass of wine or two made the meal dandy enough.

Meat, cheese and pickles -- what more could a girl ask for? - Photos by Wasabi Prime

* Post-Script - Thanks to Serious Eats' Photograzing for posting the photo of the antipasto image on their site!