|Happy Valentine's Day - I got you diabetes - Photo by Wasabi Prime|
I remember when my mom called and asked nonchalantly, "Have you heard of Cookie Butter?" I was like, are you sure you're not thinking of Nutella...? And did you remember to take your medication? She had to school me on the Cookie Butter Craze that had apparently set the islands of Hawaii on fire with an insulin-fueled obsession. Apparently over the past year, the Trader Joe's Biscoff knockoff, Cookie Butter, had taken the 50th State by storm. It caused purchase limits (two jars only!) all over Las Vegas, since their TJs are the primary shopping sources when the Army of the 808 visits The Ninth Island of Vegas. She just described this bizarre entity as, "It's like peanut butter, but it tastes like cookie dough, and it's crunchy, and also tastes like gingersnaps." Holy hell, that's a lot for one's palate to imagine. I'm pretty sure my tastebuds don't have that great of an imagination, so I went to a Trader Joe's to capture this unicorn-like beast for myself.
|Do not lick the screen. It is not real - Photo by Wasabi Prime|
To be honest, aside from the overwhelming, but pleasant gingery sweetness of the stuff, Cookie Butter's grainy texture (I'm assuming it's supposed to be the ground-up biscuits) skeeved me out. I felt like I was eating something with sand in it. Nasty. Gritty texture is a somewhat universal signal that something is not right with the world. You might be eating dirt. And it has the visceral reaction of nails on chalkboard for me, so I had my one spoonful, capped the jar and immediately started looking for recipes to use up/get rid of this stuff.
Over the holidays, I whipped some of the Cookie Butter with mascarpone cheese and made an insanely-sweet tiramisu. I crushed homemade gingersnaps into the mix, and it all turned out lovely and sugar-headache-perfection. If you want to make a dessert like that for your Valentine, grab a favorite tiramisu recipe, a few hefty scoops of Cookie Butter, and have at it.
|Make your own Cookie Butter candy for your Valentine - Photos by Wasabi Prime|
These Cookie Butter Crack bars would definitely give Walter White a run for his drug-dealer money, and I'd be the new King of New Mexico, ruling the underworld with my Cookie Butter Crack Ring. But until that day happens, you can make these for your Valentine's Day sweetheart and try not to OD on the sugar rush.