Mixed Plate: The Gospel of Breakfast

I hear it time and time again: Breakfast is the Best Meal. And you know what? It's 100% True. You may as well write that into every holy book out there, canonize it for future generations, not that they won't already know and accept this to be the gospel of meal enjoyment. And I know I can say that out loud, into the Bloggosphere, into the Inter-Webs and nary a peep of offense or complaint will surface. Because we know this simple fact to be true. So let us raise our hands and rejoice in the holy celebration that is Breakfast! Hallelujah!!

First there was darkness... then there was breakfast pastries from Essential Baking Co. - Photo by Wasabi Prime

Bring on the poisonous snakes for our ritualistic snake-handling dance and get ready to hurl those crutches aside, brothers and sistahs, it's time to revel in the glory and the power that is Breakfast. I'm not exaggerating on this, breakfast is really that good. I did a whole piece on it for my Sense Memory column for Honest Cooking months ago, and everyone had great reasons to share why breakfast is the bomb-diggety. They included wonderful things like: you can have it 24/7 at a lot of diners, it tastes good any time of the day, it's got the perfect combination of protein, starch and fat, and of course the most important reason -- you can drink in the morning and no one gives you a sidelong glance. It's the only reason Bloody Marys and Mimosas were created, to make morning alcoholism more fashionable. Plus there's fruit and vegetables in it, so it's like a serving of produce, really.

I have to think our idea of breakfast with eggs, bacon and hashbrowns is more of an American thing. I thought about this as I was getting breakfast with a group of friends after a particularly brutal night of Releasing the Kraken -- we all had visions of pile o' food dancing in our alcohol-pummeled heads. Our breakfasts are a distinctive mashup of European styles, English breakfast with French omelets and maybe some German sausage thrown in for good measure -- but it's all over-the-top. Mile-high pancakes covered in fruit, chocolate chips and whipped cream. Gravy piled on biscuits with cheese, egg and a mound of bacon. You never have just one egg, it's always four served at restaurants. Even though it's all one great cholesterol/fat bomb, we love it because it's got all the ingredients and flavors we crave. And it's a savior when you've got a wicked hangover.

Stare long enough, you'll get a sugar high - Photos by Wasabi Prime

Comedian Jim Gaffigan made a funny yet true observation: breakfast is the meal that allows you to have cake first thing in the morning. Don't deny it. A sweet cake full of chocolate chips or fruit is dessert, meant to be had at the end of any other meal, but no one bats an eye when you have that monster-sized chocolate chip or blueberry muffin, topped with sugary-sweet streusel crumbles. Or an icing-topped scone. Or some marvelously flaky, cinnamon-sugar-filled sticky bun covered with currants and chopped nuts. I'm the last person to complain about breakfast pastries, specifically because we're not obligated to call them "sugary sweets for breakfast." I was like a kid given the Golden Ticket to Willy Wonka's mildly disturbing Chocolate Factory when I was blessed with a wealth of pastries from Essential Baking Company. It was a true spoil of baked good riches, mostly breakfast sweets, like scones, muffins and flake pastries, but also their incredible monster-sized cookies, jammy thumbprint cookies and some of their fruit bars. 

I'm ready for my closeup, Mr. DeMille... - Photos by Wasabi Prime

Essential Baking Company is one of my favorite bakeries and I don't get to enjoy their marvelous goods nearly as much as I'd like -- and that's to my waistline's benefit, believe me. The fact that they've got a Bellevue cafe set up at the University Bookstore just adds more temptation every time I'm in that neighborhood. Fresh-baked artisan breads, sweet pastries, all the reasons you say Glory Hallelujah for Carbs and give up those supermodel almond-counting dreams. As much as I wanted to eat all my favorites in one sitting, I just saved my absolute favorites and packed the rest off with the Mister, so that he could share the wealth with workmates. I admit, I saved the best ones and hoarded it like Gollum, whispering My Precioussssss.... I gleefully rationed out the flaky butter croissant, cinnamon roll and sugar-dusted almond croissant across a few days, savoring each bite. I rarely have breakfast pastries, mostly because it's not worth the sugar crash and quite frankly, so few bakeries are as good as Essential, but when you get a chance to indulge, they are Top Gun, Best-of-the-Best, and will be your Wingman any breakfast morning. 

Perfect Sunday morning - latte at French Bakery, brunch at Trellis - Photos by Wasabi Prime

What I really love about breakfast is when it gets fancied up and becomes Brunch, which just makes breakfast a real event to soak up those last, precious moments of weekend freedom on a Sunday. I forgot how wonderful a true lazy brunch can be, but got a nice reminder a little while ago when I met some friends on a Sunday morning in Kirkland. We planned to meet up at Trellis, the restaurant below the Heathman Hotel, which has a fantastic breakfast menu full of locally-sourced seasonal goodies. I got there a little early and gave myself a little present of Me Time, getting a creamy latte at the French Bakery across the street. I was tempted to get one of their almond croissants, which is probably my favorite thing at The French Bakery, but knowing a proper brunching was the order of the day, I stuck with the latte, which is honestly a treat all on its own. To sit in a little cafe on a sleepy Sunday morning, sipping a latte while flipping through a magazine, it's a religious experience all its own. Very zen and just appreciating the present. Maybe not as zen as giving up all material possessions, donning a robe and living in an ashram at the top of a mountain for years, but hey, this is 21st Century Zen, complete with a pretty foam drawing. By the time I got to Trellis, I was fully in the mindset to enjoy the morning with friends, have that Bloody Mary, and have a hearty omelet stuffed with goodies like cheese and avocado. And their free mini-doughnuts are a nice touch, too -- cheers to you, Trellis.

The weekend tradition of the Skillet Breakfast - Photos by Wasabi Prime

Most breakfasts for us are enjoyed in our own kitchen. And they're hardly as eventful as a restaurant brunch. It's very low-maintenance, I don't dirty more than one skillet at a time, which is why I tend to call this mish-mash meal our usual Weekend Skillet Breakfast. As long as I have eggs, cheese and milk, I can make something. It's usually chopped up vegetables or leftover meat cooked up in a skillet that gets some eggs mixed with milk poured over it, and then the whole pan goes into the oven. I sprinkle cheese over everything, right before it goes in, and right at the end, I turn on the broiler to give it a quick crispy topping. It's not the prettiest meal in the world, as I can never predict what will show up in the mix, so the ratio of ingredients can be totally off the charts. Many times, it's a Green Eggs and Ham hot mess, because there's a bunch of kale or chard thrown in. But it's tasty, hearty and goes well with coffee as we curl up on the couch, still in our robes, and watch some craptacular television. For us, this is why breakfast at home is a marvelous thing.

The makings of a delicious Breakfast-Monster - Photos by Wasabi Prime

I will try to mix things up now and then -- I had a chance to play around with Demitri's Bloody Mary seasonings and I had a Lightning Bolt moment in my brain: Bloody Mary Breakfast Sandwich! I wasn't necessarily trying to figure out a way to spike a sandwich and get a booze buzz off of it, but I saw the dry Rim Shot seasonings meant to flavor the edge of a Bloody Mary glass and thought that would nicely season some ground pork for a homemade breakfast sausage. A couple of tablespoons will do for a half pound of plain ground pork, letting the flavors soak in overnight before forming small patties to fit in between an English Muffin. I used the Bacon Salt flavored Rim Shot seasoning, so I skipped adding bacon to the sandwiches -- sounds like heresy, I know, but this flavoring had its share of smokiness and I didn't want it to be overwhelming. I did add ham, so there was more Divine Swine added to the sandwich, along with a fried egg and a smear of sun dried tomato pesto, to give a little nod to its Bloody Mary origins. 

The Breakfast Sandwich of Champions, thanks to Demitri's Bloody Mary salts - Photos by Wasabi Prime

A fried egg on a sandwich the size of a burger is great, there should be enough layers and overall surface area to absorb the inevitable yolk runoff. On a breakfast sandwich the size of an English Muffin... not so much. I lost most of the precious liquid gold yolk to the plate, which was easily mopped up with the sandwich, but it was messier than I would have liked. Upon making the Bloody Mary Breakfast Sandwich a few more times, I cooked the egg yolk to a more solid, pudding-like thickness, so its texture could be enjoyed with the sandwich itself. There's really no science or recipe-magic to any of this, the main thing is making your own breakfast sausage patty by seasoning it with whatever marvelous flavors you can find. I heartily enjoyed this cocktail-inspired sandwich for Brinner, aka, Breakfast for Dinner, several nights in a row.

Baby quiche-cakes - Photos by Wasabi Prime

Breakfast inspires innovation, from cocktail sandwiches to individual hand-held quiches. The cupcake craze has resulted in all of us owning our share of cupcake tins. I have three different sizes: little bitty appetizer-sized tins, average just-right size, and Texas-sized muffin pans. These things have been dying to be used because no one wants cupcakes anymore, they're so sick of 'em. I was going to a brunch party at a friend's house and wanted to bring something easy to eat. This was also a housewarming gathering, so I didn't want to assume everything was unpacked. It wasn't a pastry-eating group, so I couldn't hit the Doughnut Button. I decided on little vegetable and cheese quiches, baked in cupcake tins for convenient pre-portioned eating; no nuts or gluten to keep it allergy-friendly and no meat in case there were vegetarians. All the food bases were covered. Everything worked out well -- I had eggs, a fresh bunch of chard, a mix of Parmesan and cream cheese to make it savory and creamy. The only hitch was I should have used muffin tin liners. Even if the quiches looked like weird, flat cupcakes in the liners, it would have kept me from soaking and scraping that damn cupcake tin fifty times, just to get all the little bits of egg off of it. Even with a spray of cooking oil, the egg stuck to the metal like glue. I was able to get the quiches out with a bit of finessing, but the eggy residue was like drywall spackle on that tin. Lesson learned, and let it be a lesson to you out there -- muffin tin liners ARE YOUR FRIEND.

Cheers to Breakfasts of all sorts, the meal you cannot judge, even with a bottle of bourbon - Photos by Wasabi Prime

So to sum up this Breakfast Bohemian Rhapsody, it is the ideal meal for any situation, be it festive, humbly prepared at home, or a food intervention after drinking your weight in boozeahol. I love how it's the Little Black Dress that fits for any occasion, can be enjoyed day or night, and that a lot of diners all over the country recognize this appreciation for the Perfect Meal, serving it every hour of the day, with love, honor and respect. So raise them hashbrowns high and praise them over-easy eggs -- Hallelujah for Breakfast!

FoodTrek: Set Hunger to Warp Ten and Geek Out for a Weekend

I've made no bones about what a total smelly nerd I am. Science fiction, comics, movies, television shows, it all fits in my repertoire of nerdiferous geekitude. One odd realm I've never ventured beyond a casual visit now and then is video games; it's just never totally sunk its gryphon-like talons into me. Which is odd, as Mr. Wasabi works at a game company and we have more game consoles than televisions to attach them to. But I do make it a point to jump headfirst into the mad world of Penny Arcade Expo, an annual game convention that happens at the end of every summer in Seattle, to take some fun photos and support the company my Mister works for (Go Runic Games and Torchlight II!). This year, I decided I'd eat like a nerd, but in a fabulously Seattle way, heading over to Local 360 to geek out with one of their tasty burgers and one heck of a spicy Bloody Mary.

Eating like a locavore/nerd queen at Local 360 in Seattle - Photo by Wasabi Prime

There can be as much geek-ness about food as there are arguments over who would win a fight, Superman or Green Lantern (neither, as Wonder Woman would smack them down with her hotness). Local 360 is one of those places that's straight out of a Portlandia skit, the one where restaurant patrons ask how the chickens were raised, were they local, did someone snuggle them and tell them positive things before their necks were unceremoniously wrung for the sake of dinner. But it's not a mean joke, it's like a "funny, because it's true," joke, because the whole idea behind Local 360 and their adjoining shop next door is that everything came from within a 360 mile radius, which is pretty fantastic. It's part of the growing trend everywhere, but especially in the Northwest, to emphasize the need to eat and live sustainably. It's not just about the resources, but the businesses as well -- it's local people, working at small to mid-sized companies, farms, etc. who were involved in getting the food on those plates. Local food, local jobs -- quite frankly, this is the American Dream needing to be readjusted towards. At Local 360, there are no mass-produced products spit out of a factory from a continent away; the bread came from a nearby bakery, the produce came fresh from a local farm, and I'm sure someone said some soothing things to the cow before it was made into the tasty hamburger I just chomped into.

I have to say, in the words of Jules from Pulp Fiction, this is one tasty burger. Fluffy bun, a bit like a potato bread; pillow-soft and not heavily fussed-over, the perfect doughy cradle for the burger. The beef patty has lovely charred smoky bits, cooked medium with a bit of pinkness in the middle, and my favorite is the sweet/sour spice of their pickled peppers they add as a relish. That tangy kick makes it distinctive. You can add cheese or bacon, but I wanted to enjoy the burger on its own. Besides, I wanted to save the bacon for... the Bloody Mary. Awww yeah. I wanted to live large, Big Pimpin' Geek style, so I went to Local 360 in the morning, killing time before the Seattle Convention Center opened for Penny Arcade Expo (PAX). The restaurant is in the perfect spot, as it's within reasonable walking distance in the Belltown neighborhood, but far enough to where the hordes of people dressed like Sailor Moon probably wouldn't think to head a few blocks north. But that's fine, all the more Hot Monkey Bloody Mary for me. Yeah, when you want a Bloody Mary with bite, absolutely "Hot Monkey" it, as it'll be a wicked kick of spice and they jam a huge spear of pickled asparagus and a hefty wedge of crispy bacon as a garnish. For them, it's a garnish, but if they could somehow introduce an egg to this drink, it's a whole damn meal.

Do you covet my Hot Monkey? Of course you do - Photos by Wasabi Prime

I couldn't even finish the whole thing. I finished off my Hot Monkey (I just like saying that) and wiped a bit of spicy sweat off my brow and scooped up half the hamburger and fries to high-tail it midtown to the convention center and the PAX epicenter. I bequeathed the leftovers to Mr. Wasabi, who was literally propped up on coffee and slightly zombified from the lack of sleep -- he spent the night in the office the night before after working the first day of PAX. What a trooper, right? Of course he deserved slightly cold locavore leftovers! Such a saint, I am.

What, your weekends don't look like this? - Photos by Wasabi Prime

The belly-filling, geek-approved breakfast powered me through the whole day and then some, as I wandered through the halls filled with gamers willing to wait three hours for ten minutes of precious play time on unreleased games. I wasn't there to play so much as be an eager observer. A fly on the wall with a big, heavy camera. And copious hand sanitizer usage, because a couple of years ago, swine flu hit PAX pretty hard, no joke. Not a surprise, considering over seventy thousand bodies wandering about, questionable hand-washing habits, lack of sleep, and a diet consisting mainly of pizza and nachos. Welcome to PAX, where the P should stand for Penicillin.

That's not to say it's a bad experience, just a health warning should you decide to revel in this celebration of all things that would have gotten your butt kicked over in grade school. Where else are you going to see a walking slice of bacon, Power Rangers, Star Wards droids, and every imaginable craft-class-gone-awry homemade costume the imagination could dare to consider? It's a plethora of crazy, to be sure.

Games, delicious swag, tons of people...and a dragon - Photos by Wasabi Prime

So, what's a game convention like? A bit like a refuge for the socially awkward damned, but oddly fun. There was a zombie makeup table, which meant everyone was having their cute little cherubs get turned into the bloodthirsty undead. Any girl wearing a figure-hugging costume was getting serious play, being asked for photos that are by now all over Facebook with the tag, "my hot girlfriend." You could get super-modded computers that looked like scooters. Yeah, so that's a thing. And after several years of attending PAX, I finally saw Wil Wheaton. Yeah, Wesley Crusher/Star Trek Next Gen, Gordie/Stand By Me Wil Wheaton. But lately he's been busy as the amusingly douchey Dr. Parrish on the erroneously cancelled SyFy series Eureka (seriously, SyFy - WTF?). Walking through one of the vendor rooms we literally almost ran into him. He was wearing a fan-made cape that had fleur de lis shaped like penises. Long story short, there was a longstanding joke about not being a dick at sci-fi/gamer conventions, so that's where the cape came from. Note, the cape is meant to be ironic, he's probably one of the cooler dudes out there in Hollywoodland. And if you're aware of nerd/gamer stuff, Felicia Day was there, too. Damn, that girl is tiny! But cute as a button, and super awesome for giving the good folks at Runic Games some shoutouts over Twitter and Google +.

Droids, scooter-computers, steampunks w/ smartphones and Wesley Crusher - Photos by Wasabi Prime

So there was the epic meal and gamer-fest that was. Don't ever say that this food blogger doesn't take you to some deliciously bizarre places.

OMG a Recipe: Rock Out With Your Sriracha Out

I was extremely tempted to have the title of this Sriracha-themed post have something scathingly naughty about hot cock(sauce), but instead I figure I'd just raise eyebrows and offend people in the first sentence instead. Natch. Oh come on, don't be such a prude -- you know you all call it that with a schoolgirl giggle as you reach for the ubiquitous gigantic bottle of fiery chili hellfire to pour on... well, just about everything. Let's just call this one an ode to a spicy little number that makes you sweat from rooter to tooter when you've eaten way too much of it. But hey, when it comes to Sriracha, it hurts so good, don't it?

Does anyone not have a Sriracha bottle that's inexplicably almost empty at all times? - Photo by Wasabi Prime

Where salsa is the official condiment of choice for the greater Southwest region of the States, I'd wager Sriracha is the gold standard for the greater Seattle metropolitan area, and likely Portland as well. Maybe it's the cold weather and our inability to sweat naturally from the sun that refuses to show up, but we literally pour this stuff on everything. It's a good match for the unofficial local food of Seattle, which is teriyaki. Don't cringe or wrinkle your nose -- we've got as many neighborhood teriyaki joints as we do Starbucks, and given the fact that there's probably a Starbucks within the bathroom of Starbucks, that equation equals a whole lotta effin' teriyaki. And what else goes better with quickly seared soy-glazed meats? The rooster-emblazoned sauce of champions, of course.

How we're used to seeing Sriracha -- in just about everything! - Photo by Wasabi Prime

So we've established Sriracha's lofty position on the Condiment Food Pyramid of Justice (no capes or utility belts required), but why is it such a superior sauce that rocks our food casbahs to eleven? It's not particularly flavorful, just mildly savory with a bit of a vinegar edge. You'd think it would taste like buffalo wing sauce, but in fact it's quite mild, yielding mostly to its powers of Scoville Unit-worthy heat. And that's probably why it's so versatile a sauce -- it literally can go in everything. I use it to make some heat for any and all forms of stir fry, or any Asian-style dish for that matter. Even Southwest food. Whether it's a savory soy and peanut sauce or a big casserole dish of enchiladas, Sriracha compliments everything so well, just lending that secondary element of heat, bearing in mind you're not trying to create your own sweat lodge in a single meal. Just a squeeze, if you please.

A drink that will kick your ass as well as your liver - Photo by Wasabi Prime

So what about drinking Sriracha? No, not a  frat bet gone wrong where you're shotgunning a little glass of the stuff. What about adding a rooster kick to a Bloody Mary? I gave this a whirl a little while back when I had leftover tomato juice from a brunch and some fragrant ingredients like fresh lemongrass, cilantro and ginger handy. Why not combine all this together in a spicy boozahol beverage with an Asian twist? I put together this spicy little cocktail one weekend and was pleased with the result. Not that most dim sum places serve alcohol, but I have to say, this would be dandy with some pork and shrimp dumplings. The key to preparing this drink is the new catchphrase of choice: Infuse Your Booze. I muddled fresh ginger in some vodka and let it sit for a few minutes, but if you can let it soak for a longer period of time, I think it would just make for a more flavorful drink.

Bloody Sriracha (makes about a small pitcher's worth or 5-6 drinks, depending on the lushes you have over)

1 bottle/36 oz of tomato juice
2 cups vodka infused with a tablespoon of fresh ginger (let it steep for at least 15 minutes)
1 lime, juiced (about 2 or 3 tablespoons' worth of juice)
1 tablespoon of Sriracha (to start, can add more if you hate your guests)
1/2 teaspoon of fish sauce or worcestershire sauce
5-6 lemongrass spears, split
Small handful of fresh cilantro

for garnish: smoked salt and sprigs of cilantro

In a large pitcher full of ice, combine all the ingredients and stir roughly, letting the ice and spoon help muddle the lemongrass and cilantro. Taste it and add more worcestershire or fish sauce to your taste, if you want it to be more savory, as this recipe favors more of the flavors of the citrus, ginger and cilantro. Let it sit for a few minutes before pouring through a strainer into glasses that are rimmed with smoked salt. Keep the lemongrass spears and set in glasses for garnish and keep a few sprigs of fresh cilantro to also use as garnish, if you like.